Stubby Doo's Valentine
by OtterAndTerrier
Summary: Sirius scowled. ‘You don’t mean Stubby Boardman, the singer of The Hobgoblins, do you? He’s dead, even I know that.’" A Valentine's one-shot.


This is a one-shot I wrote for my favourite fan forums ever, Veritaserum (check it out: .com); actually, for one of the newest and coolest clubs I'm in: The Seriously Devoted Padfoot Guild. I hope you really like it and leave some reviews if you please =) And check out! Because I'm planning on writing a sequel and also in getting some stuff betaed.

Dessi.-

Stubby Doo's Valentine

The black dog whimpered and scratched his side with rage. Slipping down through the icy path, he caught sight of a cosy-looking, trunk-made cottage, from which a slim trail of smoke broke the metallic sky above. His insides crawled in a nasty way: after all, everything he had had in the last twelve hours was a piece of turkey found in the scattered garbage. The dog decided he could sleep on the front porch, and perhaps, sooner or later, the owner would peer outside to pick up the milk or the newspaper and see him, and with some luck, he'd earn a few chunks of meat. If the master or mistress of the house wasn't fond of dogs … well, it would just be a blow or a slash with a wand, nothing too painful. He'd been used to worse, and his dog body was thick.  
But before he did so … Those damn fleas, why had not he chosen any other fleas-free animal? He was sure a toad doesn't have fleas, neither … whatever. From all the animals, he was a dog.  
He ran to the shelter of what looked like a broom shed, and looked everywhere before he, finally, miraculously, turned back into the shape of a man. A ragged, dirty man. He stared at his reflection on the misty window pane just for a second. His eyes swept the room wildly, looking for something to relieve his pain ─ when the door of the shed burst open, and the creak of the hinges was muffled by the loud, crazy shriek that came along.  
'Stuuubby!!!'  
A mid-age woman flung herself to him, almost drowning him, but immediately after recoiled.  
'You stink!'  
'Er ─ sorry?' grunted Sirius Black. He realized of how much time he hadn't used his voice, for his vocal cords hurt, rasping.  
'No, I mean ─ when was the last time you had a bath?' said the woman, astonished and wrinkling her nose.  
Sirius shrugged. He wrinkled a few times: what was he doing, talking to a complete stranger ─ or, what was weirdest, what was _she _doing, talking to a would-be murderer?  
'Do you know who I am?' he asked, apprehensive. He didn't notice the name she had called him before.  
'Of course I do, silly,' she chuckled. 'Do you think I forgot about you, even after all this time? Well, I didn't. Blimey, heavens know where you were! Why didn't you call me? I thought we had something, I thought ─ you really loved me.'  
Now she looked quite resentful.  
'And … and you are ─?' asked Sirius, even more confused.  
'Doris!' shouted the woman. 'Can't you remember me, Stubby? After the great time we had? How could you!'  
'I'm ─ what Stubby, exactly?'  
Doris snorted.  
'Don't come here and pretend you've run into a kind of mental gap, Stubby Boardman!'  
Sirius scowled.  
'You don't mean Stubby Boardman, the singer of The Hobgoblins, do you? He's dead, even I know that.'  
Doris let out a pitiful laugh.  
'Oh, come here now, Stubby! How can I shout at you and be mad at you when it's obvious you've been through such a misfortune that has affected you so badly!' she said, grabbing Sirius' hands, which twitched in discomfort. He had forgotten what a human hand felt on his human flesh. 'I'll tell you what we're going to do: I'll take you up to my house and you'll have a nice, warm bath ─ or deep purge, I should say ─ and you'll get some clothes, I think I still have some. Oh Merlin's beard, you came … and on Valentine's Day!'  
Still shocked, Sirius let her to drag him all the way to the cottage. After she managed to take him upstairs and get him into the little bathroom, she beamed at him.  
'Now I better let you do it yourself, should I?' Doris giggled.  
Sirius slowly took off the dirty clothes he wore and got into the bath, which she had promptly filled with warm water. Indeed, he hadn't had a wash for such a long time that he wasn't able to remember. For a while, he forgot he still had a long way to Hogwarts.  
Doris knocked the door.  
'May I enter? I could help you, if you've got any trouble finding the sponge.'  
'Yeah ─ yeah,' replied Sirius.  
Doris sat on a stool next to the bath and scrubbed Sirius back, staring at him meanwhile.  
'You ─ you haven't got to do that. I'm ok,' said Sirius, quietly, despite the change was pleasant.  
But she didn't stop.  
'Will you tell me where you have been, Stubby?' she said softly.  
Sirius thought carefully what to answer. That woman wasn't definitely on her right mind, she probably wouldn't believe anything of what he told her about.  
'I've been in Azkaban,' he said, his voice still harsh.  
'What? Why?' she said, surprised, but then her jaw fell open. 'Then it's true! It's true what I've heard, all those awful rumours ─'  
Sirius' lethargic brain set on work as fast as it could: he didn't have a wand now, the only thing he could do in any case was ─ to try and trick her. But an unexpected tear tracked down her cheek.  
'Oh, Stubby … They still think it was you who committed that slaughter. Don't you remember what we were doing that day? Where we were that day?'  
'Should I?' grumbled Sirius.  
Doris caressed his rough cheek, at what he, once again, recoiled.  
'We were in a romantic dinner, by candle light, you and I ─' She shook her head. 'Never mind. The point is, we've got to go to the Ministry! We've got to let them know you're here, and they will know you're innocent!'  
Sirius startled so badly that he almost jumped out of the bath.  
'No! No, please!'  
'W— why not? You're innocent, they're hunting you down, all around the world!' protested Doris.  
'Because ─' he hesitated. 'Because ─ it's ─ it's Valentine's! I don't really want to spend it doing stuff like ─ going to the Ministry. I'd rather be with you.'  
He held her hands as he talked and looked her straight into the eye, so it was absolutely convincing. Doris went out of breath.  
'Really? Do you?'  
'Of ─ of course I do! Why do you think I've ran all those miles today, if it's not to be with you?' He winked at her. 'To commit murder?'  
He laughed wildly, while Doris gazed at him, mesmerized.  
'Why don't we go picnic?'  
Now she was the one who cackled, out of control.  
'What? A picnic? The only picnic we could go is next to the fireplace!'  
Sirius cursed himself through gritted teeth. All those years must have ruined his humour sense, he thought.  
'Then ─ let's go! Why not a picnic by the fireplace? It'd be ─ great.'  
'Aw, you're still so sweet! Get changed, then, and I shall prepare the ─ picnic!' she giggled, and placing a kiss on Sirius' sopping head, she left the bathroom.  
_Well, mate_, thought Sirius as he sank himself to the bottom of the bath, _that's what you've got, then. After all these years of solitude, you come out to the world and ─ voilá, a Valentine's date._


End file.
